Food Plate? Try the new Drink Pyramid.

Over the years, the booze that finds its way into my glass has changed. My foray into cocktails was a horrific ride on Captain Morgan’s pirate ship to Kahlua Bay, with stops to pick up shipmate Mike and his hard lemonade and this odd fellow named Yuengling who always carried a treasure chest of copper with him. He used to lick it at night – it was very strange. But, without getting into too much more detail, let’s just call this time period “The Dark Ages.”

From there, I discovered simple, but exciting new things. For example, gin was actually good in things other than a Long Island Iced Tea and whiskey was aggressively delicious. And as I’m sure any cocktail geek would say, the adventures that followed involved the unwavering desire to research and acquire every possible spirit, bitter, and syrup on the planet. Though at the end of the day, there is always Tecate or Old German in a can.

Cocktail Geeks; Malort and Zirbenz (use sparingly for torture); Obscure base spirits and bitters (1 -2 servings); Impossible-to-find liqueurs and amari (2 - 3 servings); Smuggled rum (3 - 5 servings); Tecate (in a can), Fernet, and rye whiskey (6 - 11 servings)

Rest of the World; 
Bitters (use sparingly); Out-of-season fruit juice bottle, can, or juice pouch (2 - 3 servings); Cheap rum in a plastic bottle (3 - 5 servings); MD 20/20 and woodchuck (4 - 6 servings); Ice beer (in a new-fangled useless bottle, boxed wine, or vodka (6 - 11 servings)

KP Question

  • What does your Drink Pyramid look like?

13 Responses to “Food Plate? Try the new Drink Pyramid.”

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13 Comments to “ Food Plate? Try the new Drink Pyramid.”
  1. Doug WinshipNo Gravatar says:


    My pyramid, from the bottom up:
    Row 1:
    New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc • Pegus (With a tattooed lime wedge) • Australian Chardonnay
    [ 6-11 Servings ]
    Row 2:
    Old-Fashioneds (Rum, Rye, or Bourbon)
    [2-4 Servings]
    Manhattans (Impossibly expensive Bourbon or any old Rye)
    [2-3 Servings]
    Row 3:
    Bizarre Concoctions (found on other blogs)
    [1-2 Servings]
    [February Only, or whenever I damn well feel like it]

  2. Missing from the bottom level of the Geek pyramid is Smith & Cross – let’s be honest, cocktail geeks drink that like water.

  3. MartinNo Gravatar says:

    More than even s&c: the geek pyramid needs mezcal.

  4. Darcy O'NeilNo Gravatar says:

    My base is micro-brewed beer, rum and no Fernet.

    • MarleighNo Gravatar says:

      Along with Darcy, I would sub craft beer for Tecate or Old German. Dale’s Pale comes in cans for that “I don’t think I should be trusted with glass right now” safety net.

  5. TiareNo Gravatar says:

    Micro brewed beer – yes! rum and more rum and S&C like water, liqueurs and amaros and yes it needs mezcal.

  6. Sunny&RummyNo Gravatar says:

    Craft beer at the base for me as well . . . and craft beer still extending to share the pinnacle with many of the other wonderful discoveries of the last five or so years of personal cocktail exploration and discovery. Demerara, Martinique, and Jamaican pot still rum are currently fighting it out in a steel cage deathmatch for supremacy at the top of my pyramid, but for now I am willing to call it a three-way tie.

  7. bekka kingNo Gravatar says:

    “gin was actually good in things other than a Long Island Iced Tea”

    How’s about THIS:

    2 Oz Gin, (Preferably Hendrick’s Gin)
    2 Spoons of sugar
    5 Lime wedges
    6-8 Fresh mint leaves
    3 Slices of cucumber

    Ladies and Gents, I give you, “the English Mojito”.

  8. Derek D.No Gravatar says:

    Mine is just a pyramid of gin.

  9. dagrebNo Gravatar says:

    I will wait until Dr Bamboo has posted his pyramid, then I’ll get back to you.

    Cheers Rick! Great idea!

  10. LabelleNo Gravatar says:

    most definitely sub in craft beer for the fernet – preferably a chocolate porter or pear lambic.

  11. LabelleNo Gravatar says:

    …Though a pyramid of gin sounds mighty tasty as well :)

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Kaiser Penguin is a cocktail blog featuring original recipes, homemade ingredients, classic cocktails, and tiki drinks.

Why on Earth did you name your blog “Kaiser Penguin?”

It is a well-known fact that penguins are members of high society and enjoy fine cocktails. Our very own kaiser penguin would like me to mention that he also enjoys various treats from the sea.

Contact: rick@kaiserpenguin.com