What’s Your Guilty Pleasure?

Gabe drinking Old German

What do you like to drink when you don’t feel like mixing a classic cocktail?

Or when you’re not adventurous enough to brave the Arctic scapes and rum-soaked lands of the tiki god? Or perhaps when you just don’t feel like writing your blog.

I’m talking about the swill that you wouldn’t dare tell Paul Clarke you were drinking, but you’re sure Jeffrey Morgenthaler would drink down like a fine woman.

Without embarrassment, I present the a list of my favorite non-cocktails:

  • Tecate – Usually accompanied by a shot of rye whiskey, painfully expensive rum, Fernet, or Chartreuse. Sip both, but make sure to put that Tecate in the freezer for a few minutes too, as you surely want to minimize any actual taste it might produce. Other good choices are Natty Boh and Old German.
  • Fernet – Put it in a flask, put it in a glass, but please please, don’t put it in your … Or make a Fernet Old Fashioned – yes, it’s a cocktail, but it’s as delicious as shitty American Chinese food.
  • Dolin Blanc – with an ice cube.
  • Squirt and Gin – or any grapefruit soda for that matter. Pour out (or drink down) about 1/4 of the can, fill with a nice dry gin, and stir with a chopstick. Make sure to get all the foamy pleasure in your beard when it fizzes up out of the hole.

KP Question

  • What is your guilty pleasure?

26 Responses to “What’s Your Guilty Pleasure?”

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26 Comments to “ What’s Your Guilty Pleasure?”
  1. KimNo Gravatar says:

    Some days, a beer is just the right thing. Wanting something drink, feeling like you should experiment, but frankly, it’s nice to just open a bottle and drink. Not mixing, no clean up.

    And sometimes, when beer isn’t right either a good old, unashamedly simple and clean gin & tonic does the trick.

    But then we get curious and think, surely there’s something we can do quickly with this Amer Picon, or surely that Jagermiester that someone left behind could be made palatable (unlikely)…

    Thinking thoughts like that only lead us to the guilty pleasure of mixed drinks: The Long Island Iced Tea. It shouldn’t work, but by the time our hand is on the can of coke we know we are past caring about why.

  2. CarolNo Gravatar says:

    Fresca, tequila and a sprinkle of salt. (This is much better than a Margarita made with crappy bottled mixer.) You could do this in the can, I suspect.

    Coke Zero, Bourbon and a dash of Sambuca di Amore, over ice.

  3. Didn’t I introduce you to Tecate? After spending all day thinking about cocktails, I drink pure spirits: tequila neat, bourbon on the rocks, absinthe on cracked ice. I guess those are not guilty pleasures. Sweet tea vodka!

  4. JordanNo Gravatar says:

    Unfortunately I’m lacking in anti-class, but so be it. Framboise lambic is really tasty, as is sparkling limeade with Aviation gin (I could drink that all the time). So not really guilty pleasures, but pleasures none the less.

    As far as cocktails that should never be made, but are: amaretto, prepackaged sour mix and orange juice. I can’t explain why, but that stuff be seriously tasty.

  5. Matthew BNo Gravatar says:

    SoCo …. sigh…..

    will have to try squirt and gin

  6. buttersNo Gravatar says:

    shots of maraska maraschino or poles off of the cynar bottle.

  7. Fernet… I’ve probably done way too much free advertising for them in my time.

    And not really a guilty pleasure, but I am obsessed with good Root Beer. My two favorites so far are Virgil’s and the Barq’s you can get in New Orleans.

  8. DagrebNo Gravatar says:

    I have no guilt about it but I used to do Gin & Wink. I don’t really care for the “reformulation”. Maybe I should try Ting…

    Anyway, the guilty pleasure? Cpt Morgan Spiced & C’Plus

    Tastes like a creamsicle.

  9. MNo Gravatar says:

    You totally neglected your love of National Bohemian! For shame good sir.

  10. Ben CherryNo Gravatar says:

    Coors light and a variety of other cheap-ish beers. Or a vodka tonic with no lime.

  11. ScrapsNo Gravatar says:

    Gin and cranberry is my fall-back drink or sweet tea and a shot of peach schnapps. Quick and easy and tasty.

  12. Colonel TikiNo Gravatar says:

    I find no guilt in pleasures despite others judgment. That said, Old Germans (a contributing factor in my directing you to New Seasons), Miller High Life, and Canadian brews such as Kokanee and Molson go down nicely.
    For liquor: Whiskey and 7-up (Seagram’s 7), Agricole and Toronja.

  13. Lush AngelesNo Gravatar says:

    My guilty pleasures read like an alternate universe version of yours: Old German, Fernet, Ramazzotti, and Becherovka and Tonics

  14. cocktailnerdNo Gravatar says:

    I often go with a pilsner, lager or other lighter beer if I’m not in the mood for a cocktail *and* it’s not too late. I just don’t care for drinking beer far into the evening (though there is that “Oh shit, we’re actually staying out til 4am and I’d better downshift, stat!” effect where beer is ideal).

    If I’m at home and it’s later then I do a quick GnT or pour some Zaya rum and call it a good time. I rarely do shots of Fernet or other amaros into the evening, they’re always starters for me.

    Also, who is that handsome Fremen in the pic?

  15. NathanNo Gravatar says:

    My lazy fall-back tends to be either Chartreuse and soda or Yamazaki 12 and soda. A shot of Old Grand-dad 114 or Eagle Rare 10yr is never a bad idea either.

    Just because I’m feeling lazy doesn’t mean I can’t drink well.

  16. Tony HarionNo Gravatar says:

    I mostly go for spirits on the rocks or a beer. But, more than I’d like to admit, I throw together “Black Russians”.

    But not any black Russian (sigh)! A Black Russian made the tiniest amount of the cheapest coffee liqueur you can find around here and whatever spirit I can grab (not restricted to vodka, but nothing fancy either, preferably rum).

    The coffee liqueur must only play the same roll as sugar in an old fashioned, mellow it a bit, but not sweeten it much.

    Just build that sucker in a glass stir a bit and enjoy the angel descending from heaven shamelessly, like that weird looking dude in the picture :).

    Chilled fernet works pretty well too!

  17. RowenNo Gravatar says:

    Non-cocktail? [Hands twitching with anxiety.] Oh, make it a Stella.

  18. TikiGeekiNo Gravatar says:

    My guilty pleasure is the same thing I order when I am at a bar that probably doesn’t use a jigger, a bar spoon nor bitters… gin and tonic. At home I use several dashes of bitters rather than a lime… grapefruit bitters usually.

  19. KeithPNo Gravatar says:

    Oh boy … guilty pleasures, drink-wise?

    – Single spirits on ice (simply grabbing a small glass with a single cube, hitting the shelf of adult spirits and pouring said spirit in) … followed by way to many finger foods

    – beer, followed by a beer, followed by the above listed spirits

    – at weird times, i revert back to college days and go with a “spirit” and coke

  20. TracyNo Gravatar says:

    Cheap beers would be my guilty pleasure and i think a lot of people too, just can’t admit it.

  21. SeanMikeNo Gravatar says:

    Who here doesn’t know mine? Cheap lite beer. Lately it’s been Coors Lite, actually.

    Straight Fernet or just whiskey on the rocks always works, too.

  22. Sunny&RummyNo Gravatar says:

    JWray and Ting, Ron del Barilito 2 Star and coconut water, Dark and Stormys, and Cuba libres are my go-to quick drinks when I don’t want to get eight ingredients out to make a drink. Either that or whatever neat sipping rum catches my eye sitting on the shelf.

  23. Gareth WainwrightNo Gravatar says:

    Luckily, being a South African, I have an ocean of world class wines on my doorstep which are both affordable and delicious. (i actually helped quaff a fantastic Hartenberg 2007 Merlot last night! Nom… Nom… Nom)

    i am also partial to micro brewery heffe-weiser but havana club reserva and coke is not too shabby but i have been known to whack a Cachaca and cloudy apple juice (good for the bowel when drunk in litres!)

    Macallan 12 when i’ve done a tough gig or alternatively i throw 250cl of Extra dry vermouth into a jug of glacial ice in a jug, throw the vermouth out, bash a good amount of gin in and watch it melt for a while. add straw

  24. scomorokhNo Gravatar says:

    Sambuca con la mosca. Cuba libre! with cheap spiced rum. Blended scotch with ice cubes. Asti. Ashamed? :)

  25. […] with housemade ingredients, has an unhealthy obsession with Fernet Branca, and does some very fun thought pieces as […]

  26. HeidyNo Gravatar says:

    Every once in a while I can really go for a 7 oz.Coors lite. That is a real blasphemy in my house as my son is a beer manager and writes a beer blog. I have to sneak them in the house!

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Kaiser Penguin is a cocktail blog featuring original recipes, homemade ingredients, classic cocktails, and tiki drinks.

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It is a well-known fact that penguins are members of high society and enjoy fine cocktails. Our very own kaiser penguin would like me to mention that he also enjoys various treats from the sea.

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